Am I A Pantser?

 Something made me decide to listen to Brandon Sanderson's lecture series on YouTube. I don't know why, but I thought that I'm sure there was something I could learn from him by listening to what he had to say. I didn't get twenty minutes in before I had a profound moment. He said something that shocked me out of my seat almost shaking me to my core. And with one simple statement he may have explained my long malaise. He was explaining the difference between planners and pantsers. For the uninitiated, a planner is a writer that plans everything they write, famously called architects by George RR Martin, and pantsers are writers that write "by the seat of their pants" with no plan, GRRM calls them gardeners and he alongside Stephen King are the two most famous pantsers out there. I always considered myself planner until now. 

During his explanation, he said, "For a lot of gardeners, if you have an outline, and you work a lot on your outline, what happens is your brain feels like you've already written the story."

Holy crap, that hit hard. 

I began to wonder if that's been my problem. The last three projects I've had , I wrote relatively detailed narrative-style outlines for them and I struggled with all of them. I think that deep down inside I was thinking exactly what Sanderson had said. I started to wonder, "Am I a Panster?" The very thought made me shudder. It can't be. It's impossible. 

If I am a pantser, I'm more a cargo pantser!

All of my books have been outlined, no matter how vague said outlines might have been, there was always a plan in place, detailing the shape and direction of the story with full permission to deviate from said plan as I see fit. I've always had a beginning and some vague notion of the end. But now I'm beginning to wonder if I am a planner or am I actually a pantser? Is this why I've been failing lately starting and finishing new projects? I don't know what they answer is, but Sanderson's words definitely have left a mark on me. It's made me question my entire method of writing, even if just for a few moments. 

What does this all mean? I'm not sure. I don't actually think that I'm a pantser. I need a plan to write. Maybe I'm something of a hybrid that is actually a planner with pantser tendencies. Whatever I am, I need to figure out this malaise and finish something. I mean, I'm a writer for crying out loud. 

Seeking Perfection

 I just finished reading a book titled Seven Short Sentences About Writing by Verlyn Klinkenborg and was struck by it. An interesting little book that is exactly what it says on the label and it's filled with tons of bite-sized nuggets of writing wisdom. It almost reads like a book of poetry. There's some good stuff in it and hoity-toity stuff in it as well. A few of the passages really grabbed me though and one read like Mr. Klinkenborg had been reading my blog. This one isn't a short sentence really but rather a list:

            "Think of all the requirements writers imagine for themselves:

A cabin in the woods

                    A plain wooden table

                    Absolute silence

                    A fountain pen

                    A favorite ink

                    A favorite blank book

                    A favorite typewriter

                    A favorite laptop

                    A favorite writing program

                    A large advance

                    A yellow pad

                    A wastebasket

                    A shotgun

                    The early light of morning

                    The moon at night

                    A rainy afternoon

                    A thunderstorm with high winds

                    The first snow of winter

                    A cup of coffee in just the right cup

                    A beer

                    A mug of green tea

                    A bourbon

                    Solitude

            Soon or later the need for any one of these will prevent you from writing."

I'm not sure who needs a shotgun before writing. 

Oof. Talk about a punch to the gut. This nails that feeling I had when I wrote about typewriters and writing sheds and the wardrobe of writers. (Well, I mean, I've never needed a shotgun for anything let alone writing!) I'm seeking perfection where perfection doesn't matter. But in reality, they are nothing more than distractions. It's never going to be perfect and I need to come to grips with that. Things are never going to be perfect when writing and they don't need to be. Much like the writing itself doesn't need to be perfect. It's all about getting these ideas on paper. Or through a keyboard. And that's where my focus should be, not on building a writer's shed or wearing the right clothes when I'm writing. I've got to get the ideas out of my brain and to their destination. I can worry about perfection later.